I've been getting increasingly into Alt-Right/Fringe-Right/Qanon/Pizzagate conspiracy theories lately. I had looked into Pizzagate before but was mostly satisfied with the official debunking. My renewed interest sprouted with Wayfair's (Waif-Fare's?) $12k child trafficking cabinets and then took root after watching the intriguing documentary Fall of the Cabal. I subscribed to Riss Flex on YouTube and fellinlovewithmyself on Instagram (warning: occasionally some extremely disturbing content there especially) and I am now deep in the rabbit hole.

I grant you there is a low signal-to-noise ratio with probably most of it being some combination of bullshit, hoax, hyperbole, and unverifiable allegation. And yet after compensating for all that there are some very valid points and very legitimate concerns. In other words, there are bizarre and irrefutable facts that hatch a theory that then gets spun into a fragile tower of bullshit. The bullshit is disproven and so the core theory is considered debunked. Possibly incorrectly, but in any case no good explanation is provided to address the original facts.

Here are the things I've been researching (or "conclusion shopping for my insane hypotheses" as some skeptics would say).

Pizzagate

I consider Pizzagate to be a catch-all phrase for everything else I mention here. To me it's just a shorthand for saying "global elite satanic cannibalistic pedophilic child sex trafficking and murder conspiracy", as this entire line of inquiry started with Pizzagate.

Supposedly we have Anthony Weiner to thank, indirectly, for Pizzagate. After his laptop was seized due to sexting a minor, police allegedly found a treasure trove on his laptop that provided evidence of at least a pedophile sex ring and possibly even videos of high-profile politicians indulging in cannibalistic satanic rituals. Why keep evidence on one's laptop? Well, I'm not sure of his alleged level of involvement but offhand I don't think he's directly involved. Supposedly he kept it all in a folder called "Life Insurance". A big problem is that this entire story is the assertion of Pizzagate "whistleblowers"and has no evidence to back it up. And yet those original allegations do point to some hard facts which should be considered.

The initial Pizzagate evidence comes from the leaked Podesta emails and other emails posted on the generally credible WikiLeaks. There are a number of oddly-worded emails that refer to pizza and hotdogs among other things.

Now it is alleged that pizza and hotdogs are code words referring to underage girls and boys for sexual purposes. Cheese means younger girls, pasta means younger guys, sauce means semen in general, and and map means semen evidence (as in DNA map). I say alleged because despite the number of alt-right code word table memes with an FBI logo on them, I cannot actually find any official bulletin from the FBI with those definitions. But pizza and hotdogs certainly make sense in terms of the general outline of the genital area. And in my opinion pizza could refer to child sex objects of either gender - I think the origin of the code phrase (if it is one) is Child Porn = CP = Cheese Pizza.

Does that theory turn innocent conversations about pizza and hotdogs into something creepy? Sure. And yet - it seems like the WikiLeaks emails contain some conversations that only make sense in that context. I challenge you to interpret the following emails as being innocuous and invite you to consider them in terms of those code phrases.

Example 1 (Source)

Sent: Thursday, May 14, 2009 2:39 PM
Subject: RE: Get ready for "Chicago Hot Dog Friday"

I think Obama spent about $65,000 of the tax-payers money flying in
pizza/dogs from Chicago for a private party at the White House not long
ago, assume we are using the same channels?
If we get the same "waitresses," I'm all for it!!!

Note: this was in early 2009 - Obama was elected President in 2008 and took office in 2009. If he really did throw such a party it could have easily been before he was President.

This doesn't prove anything but... $65k flying in pizza and hotdogs from Chicago?! "Assume we are using the same channels"? "If we get the same 'waitresses' I'm all for it"?!

Example 2 (Source)

Mary and John
I think you should give notice when changing strategies which have been long in place. I immediately realized something was different by the shape of the box and I contemplated who would be sending me something in the square shaped box. Lo and behold, instead of pasta and wonderful sauces, it was a lovely, tempting assortment of cheeses, Yummy. I am awaiting the return of my children and grandchildren from their holiday travels so that we can demolish them. Thank you so much. I hope you and your gang are well.
I miss you both
Best wishes fro a merry Christmas and Happy New Year.
Herb

Ps. Do you think I'll do better playing dominos on cheese than on pasta?

"Give notice when changing strategies" when talking about expecting pasta and getting cheese as a gift? Who talks like that? Who gives "pasta and wonderful sauces" as a gift? Playing dominos on cheese versus on pasta?!

Example 3 (Source)

From: John Podesta
Sent: Wednesday, September 03, 2014 9:29 PM
To: Sandler, Susan
Subject: Re: Did you leave a handkerchief

It's mine, but not worth worrying about.

On Sep 2, 2014 2:54 PM, "Sandler, Susan" wrote:

Hi John, The realtor found a handkerchief (I think it has a map that seems pizza-related. Is it yorus? They can send it if you want. I know you’re busy, so feel free not to respond if it’s not yours or you don’t want it.

From: Kathryn Tate
To: Sandler, Susan Cc: Sandler, Herbert
Susan & Herb I just came from checking the Field house and I have a square cloth handkerchief (white w/ black) that was left on the kitchen island. Happy to send it via the mail if you let me know where I should send it.

To recap this:

  1. A realtor finds a handkerchief and asks if Susan and Herb want it. That's all she says. Nothing about maps, nothing about pizza.
  2. Susan emails John and asks if the handkerchief is his. She doesn't seem sure about that, but she does seem pretty sure that it's got a "pizza-related map" on it.
  3. John says that it's "not worth worrying about".

This email thread doesn't make sense when read at face value. There's gotta be something else going on there.

John Podesta's brother is Tony Podesta. Tony Podesta and his (now-ex) wife have some interesting art in his house, including this sculpture which (officially or not) is very similar to the way that Jeffrey Dahlmer posed one of his victims:

More art from Tony's house. The two red-starred paintings below are verified to be or have been in his house and the others are by the same artist.

So Tony has perhaps just three pieces of art that are controversial. Damning? No. But curiouser and curiouser.

Oh, one more thing about Tony Podesta and his wife Heather (source):

Wearing red shoes is allegedly a satanic power thing that pops up all the time in these warrens.

A big part of the original Pizzagate theory and its debunking centers on Comet Ping Pong in Washington DC. It had some weird art and some disturbing Instagram posts. The conspiracy theorists took it too far. For example, the owner, James Alefantis, had posted a photo of a large windowless room that might be a walk-in cooler. The CT's fixated on that as evidence of a secret basement and perhaps secret network of tunnels under the building. With that and other similarly shaky points of evidence supporting their allegations, disproving those allegations effectively debunked the story as far as the mainstream media is concerned.

And yet - some weird facts underpinning everything are still there, like the Instagram posts. Here's one more weird thing. In this 2016 video James Alefantis says of himself:

I needed a job. Didn't have many skills. I dropped out of college and I knew how to cook. So 10 years ago we opened this pizza place. Basically nobody came. And then eventually it got very popular.

That doesn't sound so weird on the surface. He opened a pizza place as a college drop-out in 2006 and it took a long time to become successful. Just an American success story. Mic drop!

Well - let me pick that mic back up. Because his success story is even bigger than you'd think. Because in 2012 - just 6 years after being a college drop-out and founding his slow-starting pizza place, he was ranked #49 on a list of the 50 most powerful people in Washington DC. How the fuck?!

To answer my own question: Fall of the Cabal gives evidence that he is a direct offshoot of the mega-rich Rothschild family. If that's true then he may have been a college drop-out and he may have needed a job for legitimacy, but he probably did not need money or lack for connections.

Rothschild family in 1994. Is that James Alefantis?

I am not so concerned about Comet Ping Pong itself, but the people involved are noteworthy: Alefantis definitely rubs shoulders with the Clintons, the Podestas, and the Obamas.

Moving on.

Chrissy Teigen

I watched this generally well-done and disturbing video by Riss Flex:

The integrity of the video is slightly weakened by Riss when she discusses the odd temple on "Epstein Island" and shows a diagram with the theory that the gold dome on top houses elevator machinery to a hypothetical dungeon below - because the dome blew off in a 2017 hurricane and there are plenty of pictures revealing a normal roof beneath. Plus - come on, the whole island is the dungeon; he didn't need a special secret dungeon on his secret island.

Still, the video has plenty of factual evidence including tweets and live video.

The whole Chrissy Teigen shitstorm apparently erupted after journalist Chrissy Mayr, via some Twitter-account-tracking software, noticed that Teigen had just deleted 30,000 old tweets. Mayr tweeted a question about it and Teigen responded that "I actually deleted 60,000 tweets yesterday" [emphasis mine].

What kind of stuff was she deleting? Nothing much, just like:

I woke up this morning with a pizza on my chest and ranch dressing all over me.

Not "a slice of pizza", not "pizza", but "a pizza".

1:05am March 2, 2014

I WANT PIZZA!

10:22pm March 2, 2014 (21 hours later)

brad pitt just handed us pizza

So - fantasizing about pizza enough to tweet about it late one night and then Brad Pitt gives you some the next night? Was it fantasizing about Brad Pitt's pizza party? Either of those two tweets in isolation would be fairly innocuous, but the timing in conjunction with each other and all the other pizza tweets seems weird.

Finally:

I am going to jail over pizza

What would prompt a person to write that?! Side note: all of those tweets about pizza happen on Sundays.

This is one of her Instagram photos on the day of the "jail over pizza" tweet. She looks especially pensive in my opinion. I wondered if she was on Little St. James (Epstein Island), but I took a good look on Google Maps satellite view and did not see anything that quite fit the beach, the structures in the distance, and the rock in-between.

A photo from the day before shows a store called "La Perla" with an Open Sign in both English and Spanish. Her comment indicates it's not the same La Perla chain that's in the continental US. I've been unable to locate this La Perla on maps.

None of her other pizza quotes corresponded to anything interesting on Instagram.

That's not all. In the video we see a live interview with Chrissy Teigen and husband John Legend. She is asked a risqué question: "Best public place you did it?" She replies: "Probably the Obama thing." John is shaking his head. They ask him what she's talking about and he says "I don't know." They want her to clarify and John says "We're not gonna talk about it." Chrissy does add "it was not at the White House." John confirms: "Not at the White House. He was not elected yet." (so John did know what she was talking about!)

Finally there is this weird fluff piece about this series of tweets from 2018:

At this point a fake Hooters account randomly told Chelsea to "eat shit". After some discussion with the real Hooters account:

Why is Chelsea not only mentioning the Church of Satan but tagging them? Why does she wish them Happy New Year? Arguably it's just her thumbing her nose at traditional religious institutions but it's yet another weird connection.

Incidentally just a few days after that shitstorm the mainstream media was doing their part to help smooth things over again. On Saturday, July 19, 2020 there were a number of supportive fluff pieces about Chrissy Teigen:

Michael Obama and the Assassination of Joan Rivers

Somewhere there is an account on video of a male prostitute who says he had a liason with Barack Obama. I shrugged and filed that away as a data point that might or might not be true. Part of me was thinking: that would mean Obama is bisexual. Because he's got a long-time wife and two daughters.

And then on top of recently learning about the allegations that Obama flew in $65k worth of hotdogs and pizza from Chicago before he took office and that Chrissy Teigen's favorite public sex adventure was somehow connected to Obama before he took office, the most recent allegation I've heard is that Michelle Obama is transgender.

If that's true, then suddenly everything fits. I had never suspected Michelle to be transgender and yet if someone told me she was I would have no reason to doubt them. She's a very masculine woman, which is not intended as an insult. And Barack is too fucking elegant and well-spoken to be straight; sorry.

Evidence for and against:

  1. There are photos of a young Michelle Robinson (Obama) looking female, albeit tomboyish in high school.
  2. There are some still shots and even gifs of Michelle with seemingly an outline of a penis in her dress or pants. I tracked down the same videos the still shots and gifs came from and did not see the same thing. I think those chubs are being added by overenthusiastic CTs, which only serves to help debunk the theory.
  3. There are no photos of her being pregnant.
  4. She officially says that after an initial miscarriage she used In Vitro Fertilization to have her two girls. Note that IVF can include another woman carrying the baby to term.
  5. The two girls don't really look anything like their parents. In fact, they look a lot like family friends Dr. Anita Blanchard Nesbitt and Martin Nesbitt:
  1. Officially speaking both of Michelle's girls were delivered in the hospital by... Dr. Anita Blanchard.
  2. Barack has accidentally referred to his wife as "Michael" at least twice. See the video further below.

If all that's true, it doesn't seem sinister. In fact it's kind of beautiful in a way: America may have unwittingly elected not only the first black president, but the first gay President and the first transgender First Lady. The Nesbitts made a great sacrifice for their good friends, but now the Obama girls have two pairs of loving parents whether they realize it or not.

Except for the alleged hot dog and pizza party that enabled public sexcapades for Chrissy Teigen and except for the Clinton connection which includes Chelsea's public outreach to the Church of Satan.

And except for one more thing: almost certainly someone assassinated Joan Rivers over this secret.

Joan Rivers officiated a gay wedding on August 21, 2014:

In this video (which also shows Obama accidentally calling Michelle "Michael" on two separate occasions) we see what Joan told a reporter on August 22, 2014.

Reporter:

Do you think we'll see the first gay president or the first woman president?

Joan Rivers:

Well we already have with Obama so let's just calm down. You know Michelle is a tranny? A transgender. We all know... it's okay.

Six days later Joan Rivers was dead of complications and irregularities during a minor surgery.

The timing and the dark comedy of errors that led to her death are beyond belief as a coincidence. Joan's Wikipedia page says nothing about her statement concerning Michelle Obama.

I have heard no allegations that the Obamas themselves had anything to do with Joan's death. But I feel certain that someone in their circle did and felt compelled to silence that story and preserve the fairy tale family.

Dark Forces

There is a lot of material I haven't even touched on here that suggests that the motivations of Pizzagate (in general) are about much more than pedophilia. Simply put, it is a cabal that worships Satan and/or other dark deities, believes that occult rituals and child sacrifices will "make a deal with the devil" to ensure fame and fortune, and believes that the blood of children who have been tortured is supercharged with adrenochrome and will grant long-lasting youth and beauty. Furthermore, once you are in, you're in deep, with your own initiation likely producing video evidence of unspeakable crimes that forever bind you to the group.

Does that seem ridiculous? The cabal would certainly hope so!

The saying goes: "The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist". Except here it is human beings - monstrous human beings - doing the convincing that the idea of such a cult is ridiculous. God doesn't exist. The Devil doesn't exist. Wish the Church of Satan a Happy New Year to make light of it all. And hide in plain sight with these huge red flags that people are conditioned to ignore.

Do I believe in Satan? No, not per se. Do many people? I don't think so. My unresearched opinion is that while many people still believe in some variation of God, most of them don't believe in the devil.

I do believe in the Law of Attraction which basically says "whatever you believe in manifests in your reality". In other words life-as-a-holodeck that you control with your beliefs. If you truly believe that torturing and sacrificing babies in the name of Satan and drinking their blood will give you fame, fortune, and long-lasting good looks, then it will. And if you are into this and you take a struggling actor or hopeful politician under your wing and tell them that they can have it all if they just take a bite of this forbidden fruit, how many would have the strength of character to resist?

Even if you don't agree with that possibility, it doesn't matter what you or I believe. It's what this cabal believes and what the people they draw into their operations believe.

I will admit that this is all theoretical. Nothing is proven. Perhaps some upstanding actors and politicians are getting thrown under the bus with Pizzagate. And yet - there are some really weird facts at the bottom of all this. Very weird, very unsettling, very disturbing. Let's keep shining a light on them and see where they lead.